Why PhD students complain

So there was a lot of "Ooooohhhh," and "Really?!" when I told people I was going back to school for my doctorate.  One of my favorite undergrad professors described it as "Years of back-breaking work," and given the fact that he's a labor historian, I tend to take that seriously.  :)  But honestly, it is (so far) no harder than any busy full-time job.  I am certainly not as sleep-deprived as I was as a new teacher, and Spring was a particularly challenging semester.  However, I do understand why PhD students complain and why people who have gotten their degrees consider it to be difficult:
1.  Everything takes so frickin' long!
You can't just have a meeting, the meeting has to be 2 hours long.  Which is followed up by another meeting with a subset of those people or a larger group of people.  To have basically the same discussion.  Luckily, I'm not in many of those, and the ones that I am in are usually paid and part of my assistantship, so I don't feel like I'm totally wasting my time. 
2.  Read, read, and read some more.  And then read it all again.
In order to succeed at quals (qualifying exams - two take-home exams that are 7-10 days each), you need to have detailed notes on just about everything you've ever read, because (apparently) you'll want to have that ready when you start writing those exams.  No one wants to reread what they've already read to get an idea of who said what when you're trying to write a concise paper that three of your profs are going to read and grade.  As well, in order to prepare, I hear you need to read as much as possible (in addition to what you're already doing) about your topic, so you search every article for additional citations, and then read those, until you are basically coming back around to the same authors and articles you started with.  Sheesh.
3.  "Everyone is friendly, but you never make friends."
I've been sort of fortunate that I work in a TA office, because I do feel like I have some friends in the program!  We are all in different departments or concentrations, but there are enough overlaps that we can commiserate about our experiences!

With all of this said, I really do like what I'm doing now.  It's really self-indulgent to go back to school full time at my age, honestly.  But I'll just keep my fingers crossed that I find an awesome job soon after graduation that hopefully doesn't have me moving to the ends of the earth!

Winter Updates

So it's February.  Bitterly cold.  Lots of reading to do.  And I'm turning 42 next week.  What to do when the world is getting you down?  Apparently, return to blogging.  I had almost forgotten this URL it's been so long.

I've been reflecting (not just thinking, in the doctoral program we "reflect," "contemplate," or "question") on how my life has changed since the beginning of the PhD program last year around this time.  And I think the biggest difference is....the headphones.  I have headphones in my purse, my work bag, in the TA office, in my GA office, and by my bed.  Why?  Because whenever possible, you transcribe something!  Or you put them on to drown out whatever class is next door to the TA office.  Or you put them on to pretend like you're working when really you are watching funny Portlandia clips your coworker sent you.

I do love being a grad student.  To be completely honest, it's incredibly selfish.  When in a person's life do they ever have the chance to spend their time studying things that are really exciting to them?  Yeah, there's coursework you have to take, but you can almost always turn a term paper or project into a way to further your personal/professional agenda.  It's awesome.  I'm trying not to worry about the end of the experience, when I have to (gasp) find a job.  I recently planted the seed for Ethan that we might not always live in our house, because when Mommy is done with school, we might have to go somewhere else.  He was horrified until he thought about it for awhile, and then he decided, "If we ever go to another house, we have to bring my bedroom with us."  OK, honey.

Since I know that any readers of this blog are really interested in stories of Ethan, here are a few pictures and updates:

This was us at the airport restaurant on the way back from Santa Fe, NM, where we spent Christmas.  Anda's house was the perfect size for all of us, and Ethan even braved petting the nicer of Anda's two dogs!

Before the NM trip, like right before the NM trip, Ethan got full-fledged pneumonia.  He was truly sick for a day, and that was it.  Fever went down and he was jumping around with a racking cough.  I'm a much whinier sick person!

Ethan and two of his BFFs at the Great Pumpkin Patch in October, well before this horrid cold swept into the Midwest.  I'm sooooo looking forward to short sleeves again!  

Ethan is an awesome, healthy, imaginative, happy boy.  Unfortunately, he will. Not. Sleep.  We go through phases of pretty bad nightmares, and then sickness, and then nightmares, and then him sleepwalking (only once that we know of!), and then him just climbing into bed with us because he's restless and wants company.  I guess every kid has something.  Some bite other kids, some just will NOT be potty trained, some won't eat...I guess I should be grateful (?) that he is just a poor sleeper.  Don't tell Brian (shhhhhh) but I don't really mind sharing the bed with him.  One of these days he'll grow up and want nothing to do with us, and I'll look back at these days, wishing he was still so cuddly.  

Hopefully I'll get back to the blog again sooner rather than later!  Stay warm, everyone!