A Holiday Song

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a treadmill on sale from Sears!

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eight new big toys for Ethan, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, nine desserts consumed, eight new big toys for Ethan, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, ten days of Doxycycline, nine desserts consumed, eight new big toys for Ethan, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eleven Playmobile pieces, ten days of Doxycycline, nine desserts consumed, eight new big toys for Ethan, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.
 
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, twelve+ steroid treatments, eleven Playmobile pieces, ten days of Doxycycline, nine desserts consumed, eight new big toys for Ethan, seven stay-home days with Ethan, six quickly sewed ornaments, five days of Zithromycin..... Four lovely dinner guests, three hacking coughs, two stomach flu’s, and a treadmill on sale from Sears.

Footnotes:
1.  Going to order it tomorrow and take advantage of the sales designed for people starting some ridiculous "New Year New You" crap.  It's ok as long as I get a cheaper treadmill.
2.  Friday, December 14 - Ethan throws up shortly (like 3 minutes) after leaving the stage of his Christmas sing-a-long.  I get it 24 hours later.  Oh, joy.
3.  Three hacking coughs = Ethan, my mother-in-law, and me.  At the time of this posting we all sound pretty bad!  My MIL has it the worst, though. 
4.  Four guests are my mother and sister-in-law from Cinci, and my folks!  Christmas dinner at my house was kind of awesome.  Ethan was wayyyy excited!
5.  This round of antibiotics was for Ethan - his pediatrician gave it to him along with the 12+ days of inhaled steroids for lots of coughing, wheezing, and crackling.  We have been watching MUCH tv in order to get through the face-masking twice daily.
6.  I finally finished the advent calendar!  My crowning achievement was a Grinch ornament that I will post a picture of as soon as I get my lazy butt out of bed.
7.  Yay for stay home days!  I just wish we were all healthier.
8.  Seriously - most of them are big!  Big pirate ship, big car ramp, big expando-ball thingy....play food to go with his big kitchen...thank goodness we have lots of room in our house!
9.  I'm estimating nine here, but it may be a low estimate - cookies + pie + ice cream + candy canes + brownies...sheesh.
10.  That round of antibiotics is for me - apparently my cough is some kind of mild/atypical/walking pneumonia.  
11.  There are way more than 11, but the 11 are the ones I have no *&%$ing idea what to do with.  They don't go to anything on this stupid pirate ship!
12.  See #5.

Happy Holidays, everyone!